Is there life following being downsized after 50?

Many are facing retirement life after being downsized. Often dreams and expectations are altered from the experience.

The first time I encountered a group of the over 50 set following a downsizing was after the collapse of Russia. I was still working on my masters degree in career counseling when I was asked to make presentation to a group of laid off engineers from the aerospace industry.

I wasn’t prepared for what I saw. These weren’t men who had just lost their jobs. They had lost their sense of self, as well as a way to earn a living. Their sense of value as human beings had vanished along with their work.

You can imagine my shock when I faced that exact situation five years later myself. With a partner, we had created an amazing career center from scratch. For me, it was the culmination of a lifetime of effort and work. I’ll never forget the day she said, “Cathy, I don’t want to do this any more.” I was absolutely destroyed.

Author, marketing executive and boomer expert, Carol Orsborn recently shared about her own downsizing that resulted in her writing the book The Year I Saved My (downsized) Soul: A Boomer Woman’s Search for Meaning…and a Job.

In those blackest moments, Carol writes, “When you give up the illusion of control, it’s true that you can’t always stop bad things from happening. But you can’t stop good things from happening, either.”

After I left the career center, for the first time in my life, I couldn’t find a job and fell into a deep sorrow that lasted almost two years. I refer to this as the time I lost my soul.

Ultimately, I learned I was solely responsible for my own happiness. The roles I had; mother, business woman, and wife were ways of expressing me, but they weren’t my identity.

There is a saying that the things that don’t hurt us make us stronger. Like Carol and many others, now I look back on the time in the wilderness as a gift. It led me to this work, painting and a psychological and spiritual health I never would have achieved without it.

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Check out these new articles on the Retirement Life Matters website.

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If you’re still thinking about ways to earn extra income, Stan Spector suggests starting a retirement business to help all the stressed out people who just don’t have enough time.

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Share my journey as I visit the Hopi nation in NE Arizona.

Would You Have Lunch with a Python?

We have visions about the adventures we’re going to have in our retirement life. There are place to go, people to meet and things to do.

When the day actually arises, it’s easy to let fears and phobias take over, so the challenges and opportunities begin to diminish. There’s always the fear about money. And then there are the concerns about our health – you know we’re not young anymore. It becomes very easy for the walls of options to close around us.

One of my favorite quotes is from author Barbara Sher in It’s Only Too Late if You Don’t Start Now, “Why is it when midlifers talk of fulfilling their lifelong dreams before they’re too old to do them, they’re never talking about dreams like publishing a book or singing at the Met?”

Now is the time to dust off some of those old dreams you’ve shelved because you needed to earn a living and raise a family. What are the adventures you want to have? The biggest obstacle you have is you.

If you’ve started the list of the things you’d love to do, but… I’d like to introduce you to Warren Stortroen. A mild mannered insurance man for his professional career, he has now reached notoriety for having gone on 57 Earthwatch expeditions since retiring twelve years ago.

Once you read about Warren, you’ll want to get out there and do something outside of your comfort zone.

French Cooking and Retirement Life

So, what do French cooking and retirement life have in common?

My husband and I went to see Julie and Julia last Friday night. This is the perfectly poached egg he presented me with on Saturday morning.

What does my husband share with Julia Child? They both value the concept of ‘mastery.’

My husband approaches French cooking with the same methodical precision he approaches building his plane. If it calls for a quart of whipping cream, then off to the store he goes for supplies.

He hurt his leg pushing carts at the grocery store on Saturday. We were both afraid he'd torn a tendon, so I wanted him to stay off his leg.

"I'll cook dinner, " I declared.

I was completely lost. I didn't know where to start. We ended up pulling some frozen crabcakes from the freezer. I totally tanked.

The good news. The delicious smells of French cooking permeate my house with Julia’s signature Boeuf Bourguignon simmering on the stove.

The leg is healing and he's back to cooking.

What Stands in the Way of Your Retirement Dreams?

When I knew we were going to travel to Arizona recently, I contacted RLM Experts, Billy and Akaisha Kaderli to see if we might meet and have breakfast. One of the highlights of my job is meeting the amazing people who are interested in Retirement Life Matters. Billy and Akaisha exemplify the new retirement spirit.

Entrepreneurs’ and restaurant owners, they found themselves with a beautiful home and successful careers, but working up to eighty hours a week with little joy in their lives. They did what many fantasize. They walked away from it all. They retired early and started to live life.

The number one stumbling block people give for not living their dreams is finances. Not only do Billy and Akaisha travel around the world, often staying in a location for months at a time, but they do it on a meager income. They have chosen to live a frugal lifestyle exemplified with the recent sale of their only vehicle.

There’s a saying that most of us go to the grave with our dreams still inside of us. Entering into retirement is an occasion to revisit, recapture and establish dreams for the next stage of life. When you talk to people years before they plan on retiring they will share visions of travel, learning new skills, connecting with others and making a difference. After retirement, many people feel lost, unfocused and fearful about living the life of their dreams.

Billy and Akasha Kaderli model a retirement that, while frugal is full and complete with worldly travels, rich in experience and relationships.

Work for Those Over 50 – What’s the True Story?

As the boomer generation creeps into retirement life, an interesting phenomenon is starting to emerge. More workers, by choice and otherwise are going to continue to work. While this may appear depressing at first glance, further investigation offers additional insight.

The headline read “Career Changers After Age 50 Are Permanently Worse Off.” In a well crafted article, the author sited numerous statistics about older workers and the challenges they face in getting work after 50.

In fact, studies consistently show that workers who are laid off at mid-life have a difficult finding another job that pays the same or better. In general, people who left a job involuntarily, earn two-thirds what they did in their previous job.

Employees who left a job voluntarily fare much better. People who leave a job on their own earned either the same or more in subsequent positions.

The article continued to share very important information about the mature worker not first apparent by the headline. While workers who change jobs at mid-life do struggle to maintain the pay they had earned, they are much happier in their new work and they like their new jobs better. In fact, ninety-one percent reported they liked their new job, even if they earned less money.

“They are more satisfied and they report less stress because it appears that they have more control over what they are doing and they certainly don’t have a lot of people telling them what to do,” says Susan Reinhard, senior vice president of the AARP Public Policy Institute. In addition to being happy in their work, nearly two-thirds entered into new positions or new industries.

Work is going to continue to be an important aspect of retirement. That doesn’t mean it’s an indictment to a less fulfilling or rewarding third age. Not only providing income, work presents an opportunity to stay connected, provide structure and meaning in life.

Retirement Life Decisions

New retirement life often brings decisions. Where are we going to live? What are we going to do? How are we going to pay for it? How does it integrate into a balanced and complete lifestyle?

My husband and I are currently in Arizona. We spent the weekend in Phoenix with our grandchildren. They recently moved into a new house their parents purchased. For the first time, we’re considering not only moving to the desert, but also moving to the location of our grandchildren. On top of that, we’re researching an adult only community.

The first thing I have to say is be careful what you declare you’ll never do. I often laugh at my husband who said he’d never move to California and has spent the last 27 years here.

Neither one of us are big desert people. I never imagined I would consider a retirement in Arizona.

In addition, I often cluck at people who move to be close to their grandchildren. I advise you can’t create a fulfilling life solely around your family and grandchildren.

Finally, I’ve had grave misgivings about moving into an adult community. I always considered them to be golden prisons, isolated from the real world, devoted to a senior life of indulgence.

Stay posted as we explore retirement life doing all the things you said you wouldn’t do.