Pedometers and Paintings

I’ve never been big on resolutions per se. They just always seemed negative, a set up for failure, and I have enough of those that I don’t need to go looking for more.

I do love the whole New Year thing of a clean slate, new dreams, goals, clearing clutter and starting over. That is something I take advantage of.

I started writing my goals down in earnest ten years ago. I missed a couple of years, but with my husband retiring, I felt that, not only did I need to set my own goals, but we as a couple needed to establish mutual objectives. That was interesting and I’ll share more about that later.

As with most Americans, I want to get more physically fit. I hurt my shoulder a while back and haven’t been able to do much yoga or strength training. I want to walk more this years, so we purchased two pedometers yesterday. The goal is to walk 10,000 steps a day. First, I need to find out how many steps I’m actually walking a day. That should be interesting.

I have not been pleased with my growth as an artist. It feels like I’ve been stagnant for the last couple of years. Somehow, entering shows raises the level of the work, so my commitment is to enter at least four juried shows. I have the paperwork all filled out for the first and will hopefully be accepted into the show. I’m submitting two paintings and one photograph.

This brings us to a bit of advice. If you do establish goals for the year, set yourself up for success as soon as possible. Long term goals are fine, but break them down so you can feel like you are a master of your destiny.

Another goal I have this year is to do a better job of linking to other blogs. The first blog I want to tell you about is Ask Allison at Women Bloom. The site is dedicated to middle-aged women. That used to be a death sentence, but Allison makes it sound oh so chic.

In a recent blog, Allison discussed identifying guiding principles for 2009. These become the foundation for all the other goals. She starts by talking about how the world feels so out of control right now. As we look around, we know there is no business as usual. Whatever is going on in the world, there are some fundamental changes that are occurring. As Dorothy so profoundly stated, “Toto, I don’t think we are in Kansas any more.”

Over the next couple of weeks, I’ll share my goals with you, hope you’ll share with me and let’s see how we can make this a great year. Regardless, of what is going on around us.

Sneak Peak at the New Website

It started as a silly conversation. A younger friend was interested in SEO and I was ready to build a website for my coaching and counseling work. One thing let to another and eightteen months later, we're ready to say, "Come on over and take a look around."

This is the first official announcement that Retirement Life Matters is ready for viewing. I'm looking for a few brave people to try filling 'My RLM Page'. I'm the only one up there right now.

Read some of the articles. If you'd like to contribute articles to the website, let me know. If you have a book you'd like to promote, I'd love to talk to you about becoming an expert on the site.

I know there are a lot of sites dedicated to retiring baby boomers. I'm sure there are some that are similar to ours. I have a vision that baby boomers can redefine aging as a time to be vibrant, fulfilled and meaningful. My vision is to create a website that will support that journey.

The List, Part 3

When I read the following, I knew it was speaking to me. “I've committed to write more this year. It's what I want. Now that I've said it, I know I will drag into my writing room, and it will feel as though I have to hoist a dead body out of the way, just to sit down and type out a sentence. I'll want to wash my hands, and then research how soap got invented, and then perhaps start a small organic soap company.... But I'll stay there and write instead. “ It was written by Tama Kieves.

It speaks to one of the great myths. Do we ultimately do what we really to with our time and our lives? We all want to be happy, but do we do the things that make us happy?

There are a number a number of reasons we don’t do what we want. One of the prevailing reasons is life gets in the way. There are so many other things to get done, we sometimes don’t find the time to do what we really want.

As I wrote previously, when my children we younger we would visit the many museums that dot the Los Angeles landscape. They are now grown and gone and I no longer find the time to enjoy this activity. As the time to leave Los Angeles draws nearer, I want to know I’ve taken the time to see some of these sights.

The first problem is making the time to go to these places. Distances are so far and traffic is so bad you need to plan a full day for an outing. The second problem is finding someone to do this with. My husband doesn’t care to visit galleries and museums. I drag him kicking and screaming when we travel, but only on rare occasions when we’re home.

I came up with this brilliant idea. Why not create an Artist Field Trip once a month for the people I paint with? I enjoy their company. We share a love of art and most of the people I paint with are retired or don’t work.

While this appears to be another blog about art, it’s not. It’s actually about creating an environment to support your desires. Instead of willing or wishing myself to go to these places, I established a structure to do the work for me. It actually worked better than I realized.

I made the suggestion of the Artist Field Trip to Phyl and she thought it was a good idea. I then set up a flyer telling people the destination. If they wanted to be notified to send me an email. I would send out a blast once a month telling them where we were going. I would send out another email the week of the trip, telling people where to meet so we could carpool. I wanted to keep the process simple for me and everyone else. If you couldn’t make one month, that was fine.

We’ve had three of them in the last three months. It’s still hard for people to make the commitment. Everyone else is as busy as I am. But, it’s a start. We’ve kept it simple, but there is now a structure in place to pull me forward to actually do something I want to do.

So, what are you not doing that you want to do? Think about how you can create a structure to help you do the things you want to do.

The List - Part 2

On the one hand, I believe we all do what we want to do in life. On the other hand, there are so many wonderful, delicious options that many people can’t find enough time to do all the things they want. I have many retired friends who get up in the morning and literally run through their day to fit it all in. Some are having fun and others have traded the overwhelmed feeling of work and raising a family to the stress of ongoing pleasure and fun.

I spent most of my life believing I didn’t have any artistic talent. When I was going through a difficult time in my life, about ten years ago, I decided to start painting. I still didn’t believe I had any talent, but I wanted to see if I could tap into the creative part of me.

As a side note, I’m often frustrated when people talk about talent in art. It’s assumed if one wants to be a great musician, it is going to take hours of practice to reach any level of proficiency. Why do we assume if one is an artist, he or she was born with the ability? Just like any other endeavor, art takes practice, learning and effort. Are there people who are born with a natural inclination to be great painters? Absolutely. I’ve spent most of my adult life helping people connect to their natural gifts. Regardless of the talent; communicating, leadership, organizing and art, there is learning that one needs to engage to reach a level of mastery. Even if you don’t have any talent, you can learn and enjoy most any activity. I think humans are naturally endowed with a need to create. It may not be painting, but deep inside each of us is the desire to tap into creative expression.

Painting has become an important part of my life. Unless I’m traveling, I’m at the Phyl Doyon Gallery and Studio every other Tuesday. I started painting in watercolor and most of my art is in that medium. I’ve occasionally branched into acrylics and collage. I also enjoy making my own paper, which I use as a canvas for other art.

Several years ago, I was at the Thousand Oaks Art Walk occurs every June attracting artists from all of the country. There are rows and rows of artists who work in every art form imaginable. On this particular day, I went up and down the rows and thought how much I’d love to learn how to work in pastels, make jewelry, pottery, and photography. As I completed the tour, I became really sad. I realize there is not enough time to do all the art I want to do; nor enough time to take all the trips I want to take or learn all the subjects I want to know. I occurred to me that having too many choices results in the same feeling as not having enough choices. We can not have it all. If getting more is what we seek, then we are doomed to never having enough.

The List-Part 1

Whenever my husband and I traveled, we would always look at real estate and the cost to live where we were visiting. It didn’t preoccupy the trip, but we always asked the question, “Would we like to live here when we retire?”

After returning from a road trip to southern Oregon ten years ago, we concluded there was no place we would rather retire than our own home in southern California. The home was built in the early 1960’s. It is a typical ranch style home. While not large, it had six bedrooms, a large living room we went into once a year to open presents on Christmas morning, a small family room and tiny kitchen.
When we concluded we wanted to stay in our home, we decided it needed a complete overhaul and spent the year gutting seventy-five percent of the house to make it our dream home. And it is. We took three back bedrooms, average size 11 X 11 and converted them into a large master suite. We eliminated walls in the main living area to enlarge the kitchen, eliminated the family room making the space much more livable. Finally, we converted the former master bedroom into my office. I love my home. The space feels more livable.

Ten years later, facing retirement, we’ve concluded it doesn’t make financial sense to stay in this home. Oops! Like many in this area, the cost of living here would preclude us from doing many of the other things we’d like to be involved.

We’re in no hurry to leave. Our son is returning from Iraq soon, leaving the Army in a few months and we want to provide a place for him to regroup.

We don’t know where we want to live. On a trip back to Denver last fall, I spent a day with a real estate looking at homes in the area. Denver is where we are from, but I concluded I don’t want to go back.

We’re going to look in Texas next month. My mother lives just west of Austin. I will write later about our trip to Texas.

When we decided to leave so California, I started a list of places and things I want to do before we leave the area. I wrote earlier about going to see the poppies. That was on THE LIST.

I love to go to museums, galleries and cultural events. When my children were younger, we would visit many of cultural and tourist destinations in the area. Now they are grown and gone, so we don’t do that. It’s not a bad idea to create a list of things you want to do, even if you have no intention of leaving. I don’t know about you, but it seems like most of us get so busy, we don’t take time to enjoy the place we live, unless we have company visit.

In the next few blogs, I’ll write more about THE LIST.